jokeKing logo
avatar Careless_Spring_6764 20 day.ago

Guy goes out hunting with his friend. The friend gets bit in the ass cheek by a rattlesnake. Guy calls the CDC poison hotline. A doctor tells him he has to suck the poison out of the guy's ass cheek. After hanging up the friend asks, "Am I going to be okay?"

The guy says, "Doctor says you're gonna die."

1
0
Recommend Jokes

Looking for a natural mood booster? Science agrees: laughter truly is medicine for the soul! Whether you need a quick pick-me-up, an icebreaker for awkward moments, or just want to spread joy, corny jokes are your secret weapon.

In this curated list, we’ve compiled the best dad-approved one-liners, groan-worthy puns, and cheeky quips guaranteed to deliver belly laughs. Share these crowd-pleasing jokes at work, family dinners, or parties—no prescription needed!

funny dad jokes

funny dad jokes
1. I had the time of my life at an after hours party in a home improvement store.

In just a few hours I got completely hammered, nailed a couple ladies, and had a wonderful screwing. And if I were into that kind of thing I could have gotten pegged too.

2. If you’re not supposed to open the fridge at night…

… then why is there a light in it?

3. Why did a literature teacher use a pencil?

He/she wanted to draw comparisons.

4. Why did an architect use pencil?

He/she wanted to draw attention ✏️

5. Why bees 🐝🐝🐝have sticky hair?

They use honeycomb 🍯🪮

6. I was thinking of switching art dealers….

But I stayed with my current one when I made him yell and repeatedly promise me that he would show me the Monet.

7. When I bailed my friend out from jail, he had a giant lizard clinging to his leg.

Apparently the court ordered him to wear an ankle monitor.

8. Socrates was a mortal. All men are mortals.

All men are Socrates.

9. What shoes should you wear to make a bank deposit?

New Balance.

10. What shoes should you wear to make a bank deposit?

New Balance.

more jokes Here waiting for you

best dad jokesjokes for adult
Welcome to Joker King – Your Daily Dose of Happiness!

Here, we’ve gathered the funniest dad jokes, jokes for kids, funny jokes, witty comebacks, and hilarious memes from across the web. Whether you need stress relief, a quick laugh, or the perfect icebreaker for social situations, we’ve got you covered!

Feeling down? Click in—guaranteed smiles! 😆